Episode 1 – The Three Petals: The Pillars of Awakening

 This is The Three Petals podcast hosted by Jim Trofatter. The Three Petals is dedicated to exploring the threefold journey of spiritual awakening, where awareness, embodiment, and relationality intertwine to create a vibrant, transformative life and represents a new paradigm for enlighten living.

In each episode, we’ll delve into what it means to truly inhabit our human experience, while opening our hearts and minds to the infinite nature of consciousness. Whether you’re completely new to this path or have been on a spiritual journey for years, The Three Petals will offer insights, practices, and compassionate guidance to help you deepen your connection with yourself, others, and the world at large. The Three Petals: Where the Infinite meets the Intimate.

Part 1: Awakening Beyond the Mind

Transcend. Transcend! Transcend!! That was the spirituality mantra for much of the second half of the twentieth century. Actually, this “Up and Out” philosophy has been the approach taken by the Eastern spiritual traditions such as Hinduism and Buddhism for millennia using such techniques as meditation and yoga. Meditation’s journey into Western society was a gradual unfolding starting in the 1890s but it wasn’t until the mid-20th century that influential figures like Alan Watts and Aldous Huxley finally helped bridge Eastern and Western thought by interpreting Zen Buddhism and other meditative traditions for a Western audience, laying the groundwork for meditation’s increasing appeal. The true explosion of meditation in the West came in the 1960s and 70s, driven by the counterculture movement, the search for expanded consciousness including the use of psychedelics, and the integration of Eastern philosophy into Western psychology. For me, meditation and this “Up and Out” philosophy was the approach I thought I had to embrace in the early 1990s when I had a profound shift in my relationship with the Universe.

The early 1990s also saw a significant, yet unrecognized shift on the planet that brought the phenomenon of embodied awakening into small pockets of Western spiritual culture. Saniel Bonder, a former student of Adi Da, emerged as one of the early pioneers of this work, founding a group called Waking Down in Mutuality. Any true-blue self-realized transcendent purists would have dismissed Bonder’s work as fundamentally flawed, not representing a real awakening, it was too messy, too mundane, and lacked the spiritual purification and rigor that a true enlightened path should follow. Yet by 2025, embodied awakening has become mainstream even within many of the non-dual traditions. I discovered Bonder’s group in 2004 and have been part of similar work ever since; however, the group I work with now is called Trillium Awakening. And I must confess, that after all these years, I recognize that the “Up and Out” aspect of Buddhism is simply what the West embraced but does not represent the totality of a truly comprehensive spiritual philosophy, psychology and practice.

Hello, I’m your host Jim Trofatter and welcome to The Three Petals, a podcast dedicated to exploring the synergy of three essential aspects of spiritual awakening: awareness, embodiment, and relationality. I’m glad you could join me today. I provided the brief introduction to show that this podcast has not arisen within a vacuum but has been influenced by previous spiritual traditions and paths, yet at the same time I hope to provide a fresh look at our spiritual development.

Part 2: The Three Petals

Since the title of this podcast is The Three Petals, let’s begin by exploring exactly what these three petals represent. The name embodied awakening, which we’ll dive deeper into in our next episode, encompasses two of them: the body and consciousness. In this view, you’re not just the awareness observing your life; you’re also the rich mosaic of your physical, emotional, and mental experience. Working with either of these two dimensions alone can lead to profound spiritual growth and substantial transcendent experiences as can be attested by scores of traditions currently available to the spiritual seeker.

However, when you introduce the third petal, relationality, everything opens up in a whole new dynamic way. Relationality extends well beyond our human-to-human interactions, inviting us to explore our connection with nature, Gaia our planet, the cosmos, and the Divine itself. Relationality is like an enzyme involved in an alchemical metabolic process, it takes the substates of embodiment and transcendence and catalyzes them into something new, something that didn’t exist prior to this moment, the product is more than the sum of its initial parts. And the results of this alchemical reaction cannot be predicted. Creation, life, nature is about novelty not maintaining the status quo. Relationality keeps us at our developmental edge as evolving humans.

Together, these three aspects, awareness, embodiment, and relationality, form what we might call the “threefold nature of being.” They are symbolized by the three petals in the Trillium Awakening path, each one essential, and collectively creating a powerful, ever-evolving journey of self-realization. Let’s take a closer look at each of the pillars and discover how they weave together to support our embodied awakening.

Part 3: Petal 1 - Awareness

In many spiritual and philosophical traditions, the terms “consciousness” and “awareness” are used interchangeably. Yet it is possible to make subtle distinctions between the two. We must remember though that in reality neither can truly be defined. Both belong to the profound mystery of existence and non-existence, of the manifest and unmanifest, and of the dual and non-dual. Because we’re human we need words to talk with one another, and although these two are truly undefinable, these are the words we’ve settled on to try to convey what we understand about them. And yet, everyone seems to have their own definitions of them which can be very confusing for someone trying to understand them.

For me, one way to describe consciousness is as the foundational ground from which all experiences, thoughts, feelings, perceptions, and even physical reality unfold and arise. Awareness, by contrast, can be viewed as the direct, immediate knowing or witnessing aspect within that field, the capacity that registers or notices experiences without necessarily identifying with them. Awareness can utilize attention to focus in on a specific object or to expand to include all of existence. In this sense, consciousness might be likened to the sky, where weather patterns such as thoughts, emotions, and sensations occur, while awareness is like the clear lens through which we directly perceive those patterns. Different traditions may blur or stress these distinctions to highlight varying dimensions of our inner life.

In the past, pursuing deeper understandings of consciousness typically meant withdrawing from the everyday bustle of society. Often, this took the form of living within the structured environment of a monastery or convent, where communal rules and disciplined routines were designed to support inward reflection and prayer. In other cases, spiritual seekers would retreat to solitary spaces, like mountain caves or a cabin in the woods, where the absence of worldly distractions allowed them to focus solely on meditative or contemplative practices. The isolation was considered essential for minimizing external influences and quieting the mind, creating an environment where heightened states of awareness could more easily emerge. Such approaches were often reserved for monks, nuns, hermits, or ascetics, whose entire lives were devoted to spiritual development, leaving little room for everyday obligations or relationships.

But the exploration of awareness isn’t something specifically reserved for monastics anymore, it’s become mainstream, available to everyone. Who hasn’t heard, seen or practiced in a yoga class or attempted or considered sitting down to meditate at least once in their life. But the exploration of awareness is more than that, it’s alive, practical, and accessible in everyday life. Whether you’re driving a car, cooking a meal, walking through a forest or having a conversation with a friend, there’s a subtle, ever-present sense of witnessing that remains untouched by the fleeting drama of personal stories. Tuning into this quiet stillness can bring profound peace, reminding you that there is far more to you than meets the eye.

Take a moment here and pause. Just notice the sounds around you. Listen to my voice. You don’t have to do anything to make the sounds come to you. You don’t have to grasp for them. As Judith Blackstone so nicely puts it, you don’t have to listen to hear. No activity is required. Now, take in your surroundings with your eyes. You do not have to leave your body to see what is around you, yet most people move out through their eyes to see the world, to try to get closer to it. You can see without actively looking. That is awareness. Always present. Just experiencing. It requires no effort.

Part 4: Petal 2 - Embodiment

While many spiritual paths emphasize transcending the body or detaching from physical concerns, embodied awakening invites you to come home to your body, fully, deeply, and without reservation. This approach recognizes that your infinite Awareness doesn’t exist apart from your human form; rather, it blends with your body, weaving the multi-dimensional tapestry of transcendence and immanence into one unified fabric of existence. And it’s important to realize that body doesn’t just mean your flesh-and-blood physiology. It also encompasses your emotions, mental states, subtle energy fields, and what some might call the dimension of Soul, that aspect that, to me, stands at the boundary between the subtlest of physical form and infinite boundlessness.

Imagine feeling the pulsation of aliveness coursing through every artery and vein, electrifying every neuron in your nervous system, every cell of your body. All subtly “expanding” and “contracting” in perfect synchrony, all the while simultaneously sensing the vastness of your timeless, pristine and unchanging nature. Rather than viewing the body as an obstacle or distraction, this perspective sees it as an essential part of who you are. I encourage you become curious of your body. Place your attention on observing your body’s sensations – hot, cold, aches, pressures, your emotions – sad, angry, happy, and your impulses – what do you want in this moment? These arise as valuable messengers, guiding you to discover deeper layers of your truth and authenticity. These messengers can point to places where you hold constrictions in your body, hold on to limiting beliefs, or numb the history of trauma, your desire for food or sex and even places where there is profound peace and stillness. These bodily signals are always talking to you, looking for integration, but many of these voices are rarely heard because of the noise, confusion and static of your everyday life and the busy-ness of your mind.

This is why even though we cannot become a monastic, we must find some time to be alone with ourselves each day, be it a quiet walk, a few minutes of focusing our awareness inward possibly during meditation or participating in a body-centered practice. By integrating awareness with genuine physical presence, you honor your humanity and infuse each moment with spaciousness, tenderness, and compassion. And I’ll let you in on a little secret, when you move your awareness down into your body, not just being aware of it from the head space but actually moving your awareness down into any particular body part or region, your mind quiets. Unlike meditation where you go up and out to quiet the mind, going down and into the body can have that same sense of quieting.

Being fully present in your body can bring all of life’s sensations into sharper focus—physical aches, emotional currents, and even subtle energetic fluctuations. This can be an intense and sometimes overwhelming experience. For many, this heightened awareness can feel like stepping onto a stage where every spotlight is suddenly aimed inward. This inward focus can bring your awareness to past traumas, repressed emotions, or day-to-day stresses that have gone unacknowledged causing them to rise to the surface, creating a sense of staggering overload and even annihilation. In a world that often encourages us to numb out or distract ourselves, the act of turning inward and truly feeling what is arising in your body can be jarring, even a bit terrifying. Yet, while this intensity can be uncomfortable, it also opens the door to deeper healing and self-discovery, as it allows us to meet each sensation, emotion, and memory with compassion and understanding—a process that ultimately fosters greater wholeness and resilience. 

On the other end of the spectrum, you’ll hear practitioners talking about the “juiciness of life,” that vivid, immediate sensation of “being a body” right here and now, energized by the very act of being alive. This quality was notably absent from many traditional transcendent practices, such as Transcendental Meditation, which focused heavily on “rising above” bodily experience. Interestingly, many Trillium Awakening teachers initially came from that TM background. They reached a point where they craved a more integrated experience and found it precisely in the very bodies they were once trying to transcend. By bringing the body back into the heart of spiritual practice, they, and countless others, discovered a profound source of wisdom, healing, and wholeness without having to retreat from their everyday lives.

In embodied awakening, your conscious nature melds inseparably with your body-mind rather than standing apart. This merging leads to a paradox: on one hand, you experience yourself as a distinct being within time and space; on the other, you recognize an unbroken continuity with the totality of existence. This dual realization, of physicality and oneness, is precisely what it means to inhabit your awakened nature in the here and now.

Take a moment here and pause. Just notice the sensations of your body. Believe it or not, you’re probably paying more attention to the energy movement in your body than the actual sensations of your body. We’re an energy culture and we tend to focus on our energy more than our bodies now. Now, ub your fingers together and notice the difference from the original sensation, both are part of your body. Now, slide your hand across the fabric of your clothing. Feel the texture. Is it smooth or rough? And notice the temperature of your hands. What emotions are present in your body at this time. Don’t judge them, just be with them. They’re a natural part of the embodiment process.

 Part 5: Petal 3 - Relationality

Finally, there’s Relationality, the recognition that awakening doesn’t occur in a vacuum. Humans are inherently social beings, so our growth unfolds through connection: with partners, friends, family, mentors, and ultimately the entire web of life. In Trillium Awakening, this is called mutuality, emphasizing that no one awakens alone; we awaken together. A friend once told me that, during a period of convalescence, having no one to talk to made her feel as though she were losing her mind. Simply the presence of another person in the room can offer profound comfort, reminding us that we’re not alone in the vastness of creation. We sense someone nearby, likely sharing their own mixture of awe and overwhelm, and just knowing they’re there can bring a deep sense of relief.

Relationality invites you to be real and vulnerable, to let yourself be seen, and to truly see the other, to honor your true and total self while also making room for others to do the same. This is why small group settings and one-on-one sessions can be so transformative. When you share your insights, fears, and breakthroughs, you not only deepen your own growth but also inspire growth in those around you. Many times, you recognize that when another is relating their history of pain and trauma, that you have had a similar experience. This creates a deepening of your connection with the other, and a recognition and that you are not alone in your pain, that others have had similar experiences.

There is also the recognition that since your early conditioning, wounding and trauma was created in relationship to your parents, family or friends who didn’t meet you where you were as an authentic expression of the divine, that your healing would naturally arise through healthy relationships with people who actual “saw” you as you truly are. With no expectations on how you should be or act. Since this relational work occurs in a container of safety with a lack of expectation for specific outcomes, you feel safe to express topics and experiences that are not typically acceptable within your current familial and social networks. In this way, your individual awakening becomes a collective dance, each step enriched by the presence and support of others.

How do you experience relationality with a podcast? Well, notice how you are reacting to my words. Are they acceptable to you or are you judging them as less than or even more than? You are in relation to my words. Now, how are you relating to your body? Do you like your body? Do you hate the body? Don’t judge it, just notice your relationship to it. Would you talk to others the way you talk to your body? We are in relationship with ourselves, others and the world at all times. We are never disconnected from it. This is part of the relationality that I am talking about here. 

Part 6: Integrating the Three Petals

These three elements or Petals: Awareness, Embodiment, and Relationality, intertwine to form a complete and profound path of awakening. When you recognize your infinite nature as Awareness, fully inhabit and embody your physical and emotional existence, and engage in authentic, heartfelt relationships, you begin to experience a different kind of freedom, one that embraces the fullness of life rather than seeking to escape it. This is the heart of embodied awakening, where spirituality is no longer an abstract concept but a lived experience, grounded in the present moment.

But what does this actually look like in daily life? Awakening isn’t about stepping out of reality into a monastic retreat; it’s about bringing deeper presence into ordinary moments. Portions of the day can naturally highlight one of the petals more than others, allowing for focused practice, while also remaining open to the organic flow between them.

In the Awareness petal, we shift from identification with thought, emotion, and ego into direct experience of presence. Meditation is one way to cultivate this, but awareness practice extends beyond formal sitting.

For example, I might meditate in the morning or evening for twenty to thirty minutes, not just to calm the mind, but to directly experience pure awareness as the backdrop of all existence. I can explore inquiries such as, Who am I beyond these thoughts? or What is aware of this moment? But awareness doesn’t have to be confined to meditation. During the day, I can pause and take in everything around me: the temperature of the room, the texture and taste of my food, the way my breath moves through my body. I can slow things down, even for just a few seconds, to fully feel and sense the world from an aware perspective. In interactions, I can notice whether I am truly listening. Am I already formulating a response before the other person has even finished speaking? If so, I am not fully present with them, but rather lost in my own internal dialogue, preparing to counter, defend, or add more information. Instead, can I wait, fully hear them, and respond from presence rather than reaction? Awareness isn’t just about spiritual insight; it’s about being with life as it unfolds, moment by moment.

Embodiment is about bringing awareness into the body, rather than seeing awakening as something that happens apart from physical existence. It’s easy to get lost in thought, emotion, or digital distractions, barely noticing the sensations, movements, and energetic rhythms of the body. A daily embodiment practice could include exercise, yoga, Tai Chi, or Chi Gung, but it doesn’t have to be formal. Simply noticing how the body moves through space can be profound.

For example: Are my legs bouncing unconsciously under the table? If so, did I even notice a moment ago, or is this just a habitual nervous response? When I walk into a room, do I sense how my presence shifts the energy of the space? Do I give people enough space when I approach them, or do they subtly lean back or shift away, signaling discomfort? These small details reveal so much. When someone steps too close to us, we might unconsciously tense up or shift away. This isn’t just personal preference, it’s an embodied safety response that is wired into our nervous system. Becoming aware of these nonverbal cues helps us navigate space, comfort, and connection in a more attuned and sensitive way. Embodiment isn’t about controlling the body but about feeling it fully. The more present we are in our own body, the more attuned we become to the bodies of others, creating a greater sense of connection and presence in our interactions.

Relationality is about how we engage with others, whether in deep relationships, brief encounters, or larger social and communal settings. Many of us carry unconscious relational patterns rooted in childhood dynamics, past experiences, and cultural conditioning. Becoming conscious of these patterns allows us to navigate relationships with greater clarity and depth. One way to practice relationality is to notice our subtle or gross reactions to particular people. Ask yourself: Does my mood shift around certain people, even if they haven’t said or done anything? Do they remind me of my father, mother or a past authority figure? Do I feel an unconscious contraction, avoidance, or defensiveness around them? On the other hand, how do I impact others? When I speak, do I notice how my words land?

Body language is a powerful indicator of emotional response. For example: A slight downturn of the mouth might mean that something I just said did not sit well with the other person. A shift in their posture or sudden silence might indicate discomfort or disengagement. Rather than assuming intention, I can pause and reflect: Would I want what I just said to be said to me? Sometimes, what we consider harmless jokes or casual comments can actually be subtle forms of aggression, dismissiveness, or passive-aggression. Relational awareness is about being deeply present in connection, listening not only to words but to the energy behind them, to body language, emotions, and unspoken cues. By cultivating this level of attunement, relationships become more conscious, authentic, and fulfilling.

As I’ve said, the three petals of Awareness, Embodiment, and Relationality are not static and isolated, but are intimately enmeshed. Some moments call for stillness and deep awareness, others for bodily movement and grounding, and others for interpersonal engagement and presence. Rather than forcing rigid balance, we can learn to flow between them, noticing which petal is most alive or needed in any given moment. At times, we might work intentionally on one petal, meditating in the morning (Awareness), engaging in physical movement (Embodiment), or practicing deep listening in conversations (Relationality).

Other times, the petals naturally overlap and weave together. For example: When I’m deeply listen to someone (Relationality), I am also being fully present in my body (Embodiment) and aware of the spaciousness of consciousness (Awareness). When I meditate and drop into pure awareness, I am also experiencing the sensations in my body and how I am relating to myself. Bringing these elements together creates a comprehensive, lived spirituality, one that is not just conceptual but fully embodied and relationally engaged. This is the practice of awakening in the world, of being both infinite and deeply human, and of embracing the rich, multidimensional experience of existence.

Part 7: A Guided Practice Meditation

Let’s take a moment to practice a short meditation together. Don’t do this if you’re driving a car or working dangerous machinery. First, find a comfortable position. Let your body settle in your chair or on the ground and feel as if you have roots that extend down into the Earth. Close your eyes if you feel safe to do so otherwise keep your eyes open. Begin by taking a few deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Allow the exhales to be just a little bit longer than the inhales…And feel how the breath touches the inside of your body…Then allow each inhale to deepen your internal contact with yourself…Now, bring your attention to your feet…Really inhabit your feet, not just be aware of them from your head…Feel the ground beneath your feet as if you’re at ground level. Feel how the ground supports you. Then notice your body resting on your chair, bed, or floor… Notice any sensations, maybe the warmth of your hands, the tension in your shoulders, or the rhythm of your heartbeat…Whatever is present, simply allow it to be there without judgment…If most of your body doesn’t feel safe, see if you can find a place either on your body or maybe surrounding your body that does feel safe and settle there…If your mind drifts, bring it back to the body or the safe spot…As you rest here, see if, at the same time, you can sense the quiet spaciousness that holds all of these sensations…You’re not trying to change anything, just noticing…You might even feel a subtle hum of aliveness in your body, a reminder that you are both infinite awareness and fully human…Just sit with all the sensations…When you’re ready, take three conscious deep breaths and gently open your eyes maintaining that intimate contact with your body.

Part 8: Closing Thoughts

The Three Petals podcast offers a profound invitation to show up fully for life, not just as awareness or as a body, but as the unique combination of both in relationship to each other. It’s an ongoing process of living your awakening in the world, in your relationships, and in the present moment. In coming episodes, we’ll dive deeper into this process, exploring all of these concepts in more detail, how to navigate the challenges of an embodied awakening path, how to identify and embody your unique gifts, and how to develop mature forms of relationality with others.

Thank you for joining me today. If any of this this resonates with you, I encourage you to subscribe, share this podcast, and leave a review. Until next time, remember: Awakening isn’t something you achieve. It’s something you allow.

Thank you for listening to this episode of The Three Petals. To learn more about Jim Trofatter or this podcast and associated blog go to thethreepetals.online where the words the, three and petals are one continuous string of letters. Contact information is on the website.

The Three Petals Podcast is hosted by buzzsprout.com and the podcast and curated transcript can be found at thethreepetals.buzzsprout.com

To learn more about Trillium Awakening go to www.trilliumawakening.org.

Music was written by JK Productions and was obtained free of charge from www.Pond5.com, that’s www. Dot P-O-N-D, the number 5 dot com.

This episode of the Three Petals was developed in conjunction with OpenAI’s ChatGPT.

This is Jim Trofatter and I hope to see you next time on The Three Petals: Where the Infinite Meets the Intimate.